Once upon a time, there was an Ass who lived on a farm. The farmer also had a small Lapdog who was much loved by him. The Lapdog always got affection and special treats from the farmer. Every day, the Lapdog would scamper over to the farmer, wagging its tail and licking the farmer's hands and face.
The Ass watched all this from a distance. Though he was not starved and had his needs met, he had to do a lot of work. Moreover, the farmer hardly paid any attention to him.
The Ass became jealous of the Lapdog and thought if he acted like the Lapdog, the farmer would love him too. So one day, he left his barn and with a clatter, entered the farmer's house.
He found the farmer sitting at the dining table. He then began to frolic around the table just like the Lapdog did. However, being a hefty Ass, he accidentally knocked over the table. Seeing the farmer, he placed his hooves on the farmer's knees and tried to lick his face.
But his weight was too much for the chair, and both the Ass and the farmer toppled over into a pile of broken dishes.
The farmer was scared and called for help. The farmhands came running, and seeing the trouble caused by the Ass, they chased him back to his barn with kicks and hits.
The Ass was left alone in his barn, regretting his silly act that only earned him a good beating.
Once upon a time, on a funky farm with more drama than a school talent show, there lived an Ass. He wasn't any ordinary Ass, though; he had big dreams and an even bigger... appetite. On this same drama-packed farm, there was a Lapdog, a tiny fluffball who, if he could talk, would probably say, "I woke up like this, flawless."
Every day, the farmer gave Lapdog belly rubs and treats. The Ass watched, munching on his hay, thinking, "Why does Mr. Fluffy get all the love? Is it his fur? Does he use special shampoo?!"
Feeling left out, the Ass whispered to himself, "Right! If Sir Wag-a-Lot can do it, so can I!" His plan? To steal the show and be the farmer's new favorite. "Watch out world, here comes Mr. CuddleBum!" With confidence that could fill a barn, the Ass strutted into the farmer's house. He found the farmer eating biscuits. Wanting to be just like the Lapdog, the Ass thought, "Let's do a fun dance around the table!" But instead of fancy footwork, he danced like he had two left hooves, making the table crash! Biscuits flew everywhere, some even landing on the farmer's hat.
Not giving up, the Ass leaned in for the classic Lapdog face-lick. But, alas, what works for a little doggie doesn't quite fit the... well, ass-et of an Ass. There was a wobble, a shake, and a hilarious tumble, ending in a pile of dishes and a very surprised farmer.
The farmer, whose hat now sported a biscuit crown, shouted, "Oi! Who let the disco donkey in?!" Farmhands rushed in like they'd just seen a flying pig. With a few friendly nudges, they escorted our enthusiastic Ass back to his comfy barn.
Settling back into his hay bed, the Ass thought, "Maybe the disco moves are better left for Saturday nights. Or perhaps a dance-off with the chickens!" Chuckling to himself, he snuggled into his hay, dreaming of the next fun adventure.
And somewhere in the distance, if you listened closely, you could hear the faint chuckles of farm animals enjoying the great Ass-tastrophe of the day.
There once was an Ass, strong and vast,
Who watched as each day went past,
The little Lapdog, so spry and so small,
Got treats and cuddles, oh how he had a ball!
The Lapdog would jump, wag, and play,
Getting love from the farmer each day.
But the Ass, though he worked, strong and true,
Felt left out, not sure what to do.
"Why does that dog, so tiny and neat,
Get treats and cuddles, and places to sit?"
Thought the Ass, "If I act that way too,
Perhaps the farmer will love me, it's true!"
So off to the house, the Ass did stride,
Dreaming of love, with hope in his eyes.
But being so big, with hooves that go "clomp!",
He caused quite a mess, a tumble, a stomp!
The farmer, surprised, fell right to the floor,
Broken dishes around, oh what a chore!
The farmhands came fast, "Get out!" they did yell,
And the Ass felt so sad, as back to the barn he did dwell.
Feeling regret for the trouble he'd made,
The Ass realized, in his barn he should stay.
It's always best, as you grow and you play,
To be true to yourself, each and every day!
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